The Great Were Not Created to Prove Themselves to the Small
By: Haya Al-Oqail
Do not waste your life trying to prove that you matter to someone for whom you do not.
If you truly mattered to them, you would never feel the need to prove it.
Do not waste your life begging for sympathy — people grow indifferent to those who cling too tightly, and they chase those who seem out of reach.
Do not waste your life justifying that you deserve better because you are pure.
Those who truly see your worth will never force you to prove it.
Do not waste your life seeking to please everyone — some are not even worth a glance.
Turn instead to your Lord; if the Almighty is pleased with you, He will honor and satisfy you — despite anyone’s disapproval.
Do not waste your life holding on to people who don’t value you.
Your effort to keep them will only exhaust you, while others worthy of your time await your attention.
Do not waste your life seeking acceptance from those whose doors are closed to you,
for you already have an open door with the Lord of the universe — one that never shuts to a sincere heart.
Do not waste your life wandering without purpose,
or being a tool in someone else’s journey while neglecting your own.
Do not lose your dignity under the excuse of love;
for the one who loves you will never let you feel small in your own eyes.
Do not humiliate yourself by lifting the undeserving, or belittling those who deserve respect — be wise in your balance.
Do not deceive yourself into thinking you’re holding relationships together,
only to discover in the end that you’re the only one holding the rope — while the others let it slip into illusion and distance.
Be self-sufficient — and you’ll possess yourself.
Be self-sufficient — and you’ll elevate your worth.
Be self-sufficient — and they will reconsider how they approach you.
Remember what Shams Tabrizi told Rumi when asked, “How do you cool the fire of the soul?”
He replied, “Through detachment, my son. Detach — for whoever lets go, rules.”
Rumi asked, “And what about people?”
Shams said, “They are of two kinds: those who wish to leave will find a hole in the door to slip away, and those who wish to stay will carve a passage through rock to reach you.”
Someone once asked me why I deliberately distance myself from certain people.
I told her simply: I follow a simple philosophy —
At first, I treat you with respect, open my door, and welcome you warmly.
Once, twice, perhaps thrice.
But if you fail to value me or show me respect, and I begin to sense inconsistency in your behavior,
I will leave my door open — but I will no longer stand at it waiting.
I’ll respect you still, but I’ll never greet you the same way again.
Do not lose yourself — life is short.
Surround yourself with sincere souls who ease your journey, not impostors who weigh it down.
And never try to prove your worth to anyone — doing so means you haven’t yet believed in it yourself.
Those who truly know their worth don’t need to debate it.
Be noble in spirit and grand in self —
for the great were never created to prove anything to the small.
Peace.